Thoughts While Sleepless in Seattle, Washington and Idaho…STOP SAYING CRAPPY STUFF TO OTHER PEOPLE!


Steve and I on the ferry to Friday Harbor

So, I am out here “on the road” in the beautiful northwest U.S….so many gorgeous views…so many wonderful people…and so many thoroughly enjoyed (by myself and the wonderful people…and Steve…I think…he is so quiet…I am going to take that as enjoyment…) performances…all alongside one of my long time friends and collaborators, Steve Thomas, on keys…and steering wheel. (He drives…I think that is evident…but I thought I should be clear).

When I am out like this, and when I am NOT working (which, to be frank, is not very often…we have done a number of days where we drive for five hours or more and walk directly into a workshop OR soundcheck.) I am quite spent…which, oddly enough, keeps me awake.

Weird, right?

So, it leaves me a bit of time for thinking…which, as I say in my shows, is never a good thing. : )

I have had a few thoughts in the last couple days that I want to share…some will agree…some will not…I wish all peace, bunnies, kitties and Lord AND Taylor.

1.  Yesterday, I saw a beautiful picture of a friend of mine on Facebook…it was a photograph from their childhood. It was a sweet shot. Someone wrote in the thread attached, “what weight class did you fight in…”…which, I assume, was referring to the fact that they were, I guess,  a bit chunky in this childhood shot. The first thing I thought was, “WHO FUCKING SAYS THAT!?” and then, “WHO THINKS THEY HAVE THE RIGHT TO FUCKING SAY THAT?”.

This has to stop.

AGAIN, people ARE NOT allowed to talk about or to other people that way. ARE NOT. It is gross, disrespectful and wrong. I don’t care how nice you are at other times, this is not your right.


Full stop.

2. I was watching TV this morning and Sleepless in Seattle was on. Remember when Meg Ryan and Tom Hanks were America’s Sweethearts? There wasn’t a movie that they didn’t do together. It is strange to watch all these years later. The acting is pretty arch…and it is of a time. But I still enjoyed the few moments I got to watch.

Then, as we drove, I was thinking how Tom Hanks’ career…does any woman have this career? He plays every character…every man. He plays a lot of guys who pick the absolute WRONG mode of travel…not unlike Matt Damon (someone else’s joke…but no less valid). Tom Hanks is regular looking dude who changes weight and hairline ALL THE TIME.

Now, I think we should be able to do whatever we want with our bodies…if you wanna have surgery, have surgery…but I cannot help but remember the day I turned on Ellen and Meg Ryan was on. They ran a clip of the movie she was promoting (with Russell Crowe WHO ALSO changes weight and hairline whenever he wants) and then, after the clip, when they went back to her, you could see that she didn’t look near that same as she did in the movie. And I ask you this…do you think that Tom Hanks would ever have to consider that kind of surgery to keep working? Why do women have to consider it at all? Why? And we know I am NOT speaking out of school. The fantasy of “endless youth” for women pitted against “it doesn’t matter as much’ for men on TV and Film gobsmacks me.

I look at Seth Rogen, the late Phillip Seymour Hoffman, Paul Giamatti, that dude from that TV show that Doogie used to be on who was in Saving Sarah Marshall and many more…and I feel stiffed that there aren’t an equal number of ‘normal’ looking women leading box office movies….but then…that is us, isn’t it…the buyers of the tickets…we need to open up. Open our minds…open our hearts.

The British have it right on this front…they cast everyone and anyone…who is talented. Imagine.

3. All this image based thinking made me wax back to two separate occasions when I was asked to lose weight for roles…and when I really look at the time I was not that big.

I said no both times.

One of the times I still got the job and then was rehired 3 more times to play the same role at two different theatres.

And the other time I did NOT get the role…to add insult to injury, the director of the piece was someone who struggled with THEIR weight…AND was a woman…AND the show was for effing Equity Showcase (so it was literally 3 days long)…and it was a role I was dying to play.

How terrible…and how small minded.

4. I know I harp on about weight and image in the theatre business…but I really believe it is important. There are so many different sized artists out there who are doing brilliant work…who have the potential for greatness…even genius…who should not be made insignifigant due to the size of their belly, height, the fit of their clothes OR a hundred other things I cannot think about right now.

4a. SIDE BAR! Here is a FLASH CODE for my show in NYC October 28th! It is only valid for a week or until a limited number of ticket is sold…whichever comes first! SO if you are there or know anyone who might like to come PASS IT ON!! CANNOT WAIT!!


5. Three more days out here! Steve bought me a belated birthday dinner last night at Outback…SO GOOD…and at the end we both ordered two Salted Caramel Cheese Cakes to go. This morning I woke up with caramel sauce on my face. MAGIC.




Steve and I at the OLD IDAHO Penitentiary. I made him do this.






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